February 05, 2007

United 7111

and now a conversation between the stewardess and i on United Express flight 7111 from Denver to KC:

Stewardess: can i get you something to drink hun?

Me: um yeah, do you have coke products?

S: no, i'm sorry, we have pepsi.

M: ah, bummer, do you have DP then?

S: diet pepsi?

M: ew, no. dr. pepper.

S: oh, no, we don't.

M: dang. i'll just get a sierra mist then.

S: i'm sorry sir, we don't have sierra mist.

M: really? isn't it a pepsi product?

S: i don't know.

M: okay. then what do you have?

S: pepsi, diet pepsi, 7-up.

M: aren't 7-up and dr. pepper made by the same people?

S: um. pepsi right?

M: no. they're made by CSAB.

S: what is that?

M: cadbury schweppes americas beverages, i think. they make all sorts of random drinks. it used to be dr. pepper/seven up inc.

S: oh. well. we only have those three. which do you want?

M: do you have orange juice?

S: we actually just ran out two rows behind you.

M: of course you did. i'll just have a water then.

S: what kind?

M: i'm sorry?

S: we have Dasani, Aquafina, Osarka and Deja Blue. which would you like?

M: you have 4 different kinds of water?

S: yes sir.

M: wow. it....doesn't matter. (turns out deja blue tastes like crap.)

but seriously? more types of water than types of soda? United Express flights rule.

-ap.

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