are we kidding?

-ap.

happy thanksgiving back.*

i'm sitting at muddy's coffeehouse in brookside right now killing time while karlie finds out significant information from umkc about her future.

i've never been here before - but apart from spending an outrageous amount for a medium cup of black coffee ($2.25) i really have no complaints. it's peaceful, there is seating outdoors, it's a beautiful day, and this coffee is india monsooned malabar - so life could be worse.

india monsooned malabar: it's from india (obviously) and it's the biggest bean you're likely ever to grind up. it comes from malabar's rainy monsoon season (hence 'monsooned') so the beans are ultra large and ultra flavor-packed. just a little fun info for you there.

also i'm at home in kansas city for the next 5 days. so that's nice.
also i have no homework or responsibilities for the next 5 days. so that's nice too.
also johnny cash is playing on the radio out here. thats also nice.

so really, besides paying about 35 cents more than i expected to for this caffeinated beverage, i really have no complaints. these are really all things i should be thankful for with thanksgiving being tomorrow and all. i'll going to list them now:

in order of appearance:
- karlie
- beautiful day
- india monsooned malabar
- rainy seasons in india
- home
- kansas city
- no homework/responsibilities
- johnny cash

what an unexpected way to land 8 things that i'm thankful for. i hope your thanksgiving break is as surprisingly wonderful as mine has been so far - i'm about 2 hours into my break and i've got a decent list going already.

enjoy your thanksgiving everyone.

-ap.

* - You've Got Mail ref. add that to the list of things i'm thankful for. you can also add tom hanks, meg ryan, the internet, email, relationships and sushi to the list.

is doctrine biblical?

there have been occasions in my life when i've felt extremely limited in my doctrinal knowledge. i've played if off as an attempt to be moderate in the past, but in all honesty - it's usually because i don't know what i'm talking about. so i tend to feel like i blindly affirm all perspectives of doctrine because i never feel intelligent enough to adequately disprove a certain viewpoint.

i was inadvertantly accused of being a univeralist the other day because of this. i was shocked that i felt that i needed to defend the fact that i don't believe that everyone is going to heaven no matter what they do, but it got me considering whether i am too "open-minded" in terms of doctrine.

i concluded i was not. and these are some of my reasons:

1. i do not have the authority to condemn alternative interpretations. i'm convinced that none of us has a perfect understanding of who Jesus is - nor will we ever. if we fully understood Christ then why would we need to continue following him? so informing an individual that their personal viewpoint is wrong and that they must realign their perspective with my own is something i'm unable to do because who is to say that my understanding isn't false? i can disagree, but i can't show complete disapproval and force them to adopt my perspective. i don't have that authority.

2. doctrine is divisive. differing perspectives on scripture and in theology has been divisive since the first century church couldn't decide whether the gospel was for Jews or Gentiles. however, what the first century church was seemingly capable of doing was moving forward in Christ's name regardless. they were still on the same team - just preaching to different people. this mindset has been lost through 2000 years of revolution and reform. it seems like everyone who has a great idea ultimately splits people into "great idea followers" and "great idea haters". there is a greater reality that we can all serve. we ought to focus on the multitude of agreements. we need to remember that we serve christ - not luther, piper, bell, calvin, etc.

3. these disagreements are not of eternal significance. i do not know have the slightest idea how i stand in regards to predestination, double predestination, free will, etc. that whole arminian/calvinist argument is such a waste of time. why must we continue to try and explain the things that we simply do cannot know? we Christ-followers are trying to put God in a box. we try our best to know everything. and in doing so, i feel that we've strayed from our true callings: to love God, love others, and spread the gospel to the ends of the earth. but instead we feel compelled to explain God first, and then once we've got it figured out for ourselves then we'll move along and love others and tell the world about Jesus. the unfortunate thing is that since God is an inexhaustible expanse of knowledge steps two and three are never addressed.

4. truth through love. not love through truth. the gospel of Jesus is about love. it is our duty to go forth in love and proclaim the truth that we know in Christ. what i see happening in so many doctrinal disputes is the necessity to define what "truth" is first. this is the major flaw not only in doctrinal disputes, but also in the mindset of bullhorn evangelists and pamphlet distributors. there is truth, and they are fulfilling the great commission. but this truth tends to exclude the greatest commandment: love. without love we cannot successfully progress the truth we Christians are called to share. love comes first.

5. with understanding comes pride, and love is not proud. i have a history of pride. it is one thing that individuals as incredibly awesome as myself tend to struggle with. seeking for understanding and doctrinal wisdom is rarely in love, but typically self-seeking and boastful. this is the chief reason i feel bad about not having great doctrinal knowledge - because i'm jealous of the people who are smarter than i am, and in desiring to understand more i always find myself feeling more and more proud. love does not boast. it is not proud. i believe much doctrinal knowledge is the result of selfish motives. maybe someday i will have that maturity to discern from all sides of the argument, but if not - no sweat. i'm not certain it's an ability i could possess well.

there are probably more reasons, but my point is this: doctrinal knowledge is not something i find spiritually edifying. it is divisive, hateful, proud, and tries its best to put our Creator in a box. i can't help but scowl when we ignore the countless passages about serving the poor and focus on details in romans or revelation or acts or leviticus. who can say they're correct, and if they believe they can - who can tell the other that they're wrong strictly out of love? not me. that is for sure.

and as far as the "denomination tree" goes: i find the word "schism" fantastic, and i must notify the U.R.C. that trees do not grow in that fashion. however, at least they're bringing separations together. but most imporantly - i find this whole thing entirely unbiblical. i don't understand how so many people decided to start imitating the Pharisees instead of Jesus.

but it sure is a pretty color for an otherwise not-so-visually stimulating blog.

-ap.

november sizzler continues.

here is a motto i've lived by for most of my life: spending time with the people you love is always a better use of your time.

typically this takes the form of ignoring schoolwork in order to hang out with friends - get some coffee, watch a movie, etc. this weekend it took the form of ignoring the relaxing and peaceful weekend i had "scheduled" and driving my favorite mexican on the planet from manhattan to kansas city.

this decision led to the following:

1. multiple hours of terrific conversation.
2. dinner with the fam and gf.
3. getting free tickets to the chiefs/bills game.
4. dinner with the gf and her fam.

it also lead to a dead cell phone and wearing some of the same clothes two days in a row because in my haste i failed to plan this trip whatsoever. worth it.

the following things happen tomorrow that are also important:

5. 808's and Heartbreak.
6. last november sizzler class of my life.
7. bill snyder takes over what is rightfully his - the ksu football program.

i apologize for failing to update recently. i have no excuse except that my mind was not in sync with the World Wide Web. however, i feel that changing in the coming week.

november sizzler has truly lived up for the first time in years. and the best is still yet to come.

-ap.

my face hurts.

i am on fire. it was hot.

-ap.

photo courtesy of nick welch. he was in the right place at the right time to catch me mid-engulf. i would link to his name to his tumblr, but i don't support tumblr. just cause ryan adams has one doesn't inherently make it cool.

warren wallace is made of lightning.

-ap.

circus - britney spears.

i've managed to acquire a little more than half of the new britney spears album, Circus, coming out in december.

i know that behind almost every popular artist there is a producer who does all the work and actually makes the music and understands it. it sure would be something if britney had done anything on this album besides sing in studio and pose for photos for the album sleeve.

so know this: when i say "britney's new album rules" it ought to be comprehended as "the people who made a new album for britney spears rule and so does the album."

if you haven't heard the first single, womanizer, yet then you've probably either lived under or a rock or in rural Utah since mid-october. or you could simply not listen to the radio much. or you could live in manhattan, kansas, which is notorious for not having "popular" music until it's already been over-played elsewhere in the continental united states. regardless, it's been linked, so now you have no excuse. and since citizens of Salt Lake City rank 4th in frequenting my blog* this track ought to explode in the unreached sections of the nation over-night. as it should.

brit's new album is aimed directly at the dance club. it is beat and synth heavy and britney dons a rather robotic voice - maybe it's an attempt at sexiness, but it comes off sounding less-than-human. which is also how she comes across in her music video. in her attempt to make a comeback she decided that dancing naked in a steam room was the way to boost her image to the world. it's unfortunate that it's going to be a success story too. not that i'm not rooting for her success, but that the video is assisting in her recent rise. the video doesn't support the idea of the track either. womanizer is britney finally using her discretion and realizing when males that are just looking for some action. so she responds with that video? i don't understand.

other leaked tracks on the album that i'm a huge fan of: If U Seek Amy, Circus, and Mannequin. (downloads). i would talk more about each of these songs (womanizer too), but when given the choice between letting you listen to them and download them or trying to describe them myself - i'll pick the easy way and just let you hear them. suddenly i'm really excited for Circus. it's made my album release list just below 808's and Heartbreak.

Circus comes out december 2nd. (this is also britney's birthday. i didn't have look this little factoid up, this was common knowledge for every male back in 2000 when she turned 18. back when i was in 9th grade.)

-ap.

EDIT: Shattered Glass is great too. chorus sounds like Ace of Base. holler back '93.

* - this is likely due a past blog on Mormonism and 18 past blogs regarding John Buck - both of which center themselves in Utah.

going on - gnarls barkley.

Gnarls Barkley - Going On
Uploaded by zegonzag

-ap.

meanderings.

what is there to even blog about now that the election has ended? i wasn't certain that life would actually continue past november 4th, and looking back on it - i apologize for blogging about politics as much as i have over the last couple months. what a snoozer. i wouldn't want to read my own blog.

sometimes i envy people who can take great pictures. it would make blogging so much easier. plus it would improve the overall aesthetic of my blog (which, lets be honest, hasn't been my first course of action since joining blogspot in 2006.) in fact i picked a scheme and haven't strayed from it to this day. i think i may have changed the "visited link color" once back in early 2007. if i cared about blog layout, i'd switch to tumblr. ryan adams has one i hear.

i was sitting in social interaction an hour ago. my professor said something like "i dont want to be here anymore than you do." i found that funny - we all subject ourselves to something none of us really want to do. it's always odd to me that we all get together three times a week when i'm confident 100% of us don't want to.

sometimes i like to go back and read my old old old posts and giggle at how immature i was in high school and early in college. chances are i'll check this post three years or so from now and find myself equally immature now. 26 is so old.

-ap.

obama win causes obsessive supporters to realize how empty their lives are

Obama Win Causes Obsessive Supporters To Realize How Empty Their Lives Are

i was in tears after this one. the onion is sheer genius.

-ap.

love wins.

it's difficult to come up with something to blog about in the emotionally charged wake of last night's election. it's difficult to be happy while so many others are disappointed, and it is certainly hard to be publicly proud when so many are frustrated and pessimistic.

last night was history. it was the culmination of so many positive things in the united states and also marked the beginning of a new era in this nation. i'm proud to be an american today. regardless how you cast your vote (if you did) or whether you have hope or think we're doomed - no one can deny an incredible step toward racial reconciliation in this country. maybe the largest step taken yet.

i was impressed with john mccain's speech last night. he was classy and there is no doubt that he loves this country dearly. for the mccain supporters who have littered the internet with hateful disgust toward america and its new president-elect, you are acting in a way that would disgrace the man for whom you cast your vote. i pray that mccain supporters can emulate john's love for this country and hope to avoid the failure they see so imminent. nothing good comes from hatred and fear.

i am confident that this country has taken a step in the right direction. now is our chance to continue pressing on in love for a better future for this country. i am hopeful and will continue to pray for our leaders, as well as the people they govern. i encourage you to do the same.

-ap.

hope for the jefes.

since everyone else is talking about the election on november 4th, i'll try and bring some fresh air to the currently politically saturated world wide web. lets talk chiefs football.

players i need to address:

1. tyler thigpen. if anyone wants to hear some thigpen encouragement - you can hear it on the AM radio (everclear ref). 610 sports callers are praising him as our solution at QB forever. there isn't anyone getting more encouragement than t-square. no wonder he's performing with so much more confidence. when the world believes in you then you start acting like you're supposed to be there - heck, a couple people have called in claiming he could be the next tom brady. i'm reluctant to go that far, there is quite a difference between the michigan wolverines and the coastal carolina...chanitcleers. main difference: i didnt have to look up "wolverines". do i believe that tyler thigpen is the quarterback of the future in kc? not yet. but do i believe he's got a shot depending on how he plays in the next 8 games? absolutely. i'm not even sure we need to draft a QB this year seeing that this year's QB class sucks and next year's will rule. we could suffice with signing some washed up veteran as a back up. maybe. it all depends on t-square's performance from here on out. also, when the nickname "t-square" takes off - you heard it here first.

2. larry johnson. haven't missed him at all the last few weeks. is he a better rusher than charles and smith? you bet he is. but when you've got the opportunity to be an example for these new guys and you're spitting alcohol at women instead? pitiful. charles ran for over 100 yards on sunday and kolby smith looked terrific before he got hurt, and for the first time this year i actually agree with the complaints and beliefs that the chiefs ought to just ship him elsewhere. maybe the cowboys would take him. not that they need him with barber back there, but they seem to have a distinct interest in players with off-the-field issues.

3. the brandons: carr, flowers, and (branden) albert. we've got two stellar corners in carr and flowers. the injuries to flowers and johnson in the second half is why we lost the game to tampa. they picked on flowers side the moment he went out and the chiefs couldn't stop garcia and galloway. when we're healthy and older we're going to have one of the best secondaries in the nfl. you wait and see. flowers, carr, page, pollard. i think they're all future pro-bowlers. and branden albert ruled this sunday. thigpen had plenty of time and albert is the main reason. he's getting better and healthier every game, and it shows.

4. chan gailey. funny name, great play calling on sunday. it helps when you have the same quarterback for two consecutive games, but i was so excited to see the chiefs mixing it up on offense. wildcat formation? loved it. i was sprinting around my house declaring the play below as the "play of my life." also, when we had the ball late in the game we didn't go super conservative (instead tony g got called for a bogus offensive pass interference), but we didn't just hand it to charles off-tackle 3 times and punt like last week. high five chan. your report card landed its first A this week.

5. mark bradley and devard darling: bradley for that unbelievable pass (see below) and darling for finally making a case for him as the #2 receiver after bowe. i had begun to think DD was a bust - don't act like that isn't hilarious. also some props to brad cottam for existing. i'm not certain that i'd even heard his name through week seven. the receivers were open for thigpen on sunday and that was encouraging. and how about bradley's pass. wow. just please watch the video below and visualize me stomping around utilizing the double fist pump to it's utmost potential.

play of my life:


ahh. i could watch it over and over. all in all - we're making strides. after watching us play atlanta, tennessee and carolina i was certain that this "youth movement" was more of a "youth stagnant". it's good to see that i may stand corrected. there is hope in kansas city. maybe next year we can keep it up for 4 quarters instead of 1 1/2.

go chiefs.
-ap.

dark knight/toy story trailer.

this is one of the greatest trailer mash-ups i've ever seen. whoever did this is a genius.



-ap.

copped from marko.